What Am I, A Deer?

Synopsis

What does it mean to lose yourself—and is that something you should be aiming for?

A young woman with little interest in games takes up a job in Frankfurt at a famous gaming company, naively set on reinvention. On her morning commute, in the familiar clutches of tedium and self-loathing, she encounters a kind-eyed stranger who returns her forgotten umbrella and finds herself catapulted into a dizzying, year-long whirlwind of obsession—not just with this endlessly attractive spectre, but also with the feverish karaoke trips from which she draws the ultimate solace.

With astonishing existential acuity, Polly Barton's formidable debut novel renders the paradoxes of modern life in all its complexity, in deliriously self-conscious prose that is at once propulsive, titillating, and bitingly funny. Echoing with the sounds of Whitney Houston and The Cure, reaching for the sublime in dark, sweaty karaoke boxes, What Am I, A Deer? is an exhilarating exploration of authenticity, fantasy, romance, obsession, and intoxication.

About the Author

Polly Barton is a British writer and Japanese literary translator. She is the author of the acclaimed nonfiction work Fifty Sounds and Porn: An Oral History, and has translated numerous contemporary Japanese writers into English. Her work explores language, identity, intimacy, and the complexities of human connection. What Am I, A Deer? is her debut novel.

Publisher
Fitzcarraldo Editions

Publication Date
March 26, 2026

Format
Paperback

Pages
248

Subjects
Literary Fiction · Contemporary Fiction · Psychological Fiction · Coming of Age · Identity · Obsession · Humour

ISBN
9781804272176